And secondly (and more importantly) because confidence one of the biggest triggers of attraction in women.

If you’re wondering how to build confidence with women, here’s a couple of things you should start doing every day to help build your “Inner Game”:

1. Use Affirmations

Affirmations are positive statements of your beliefs and behavior that you speak aloud, listen to, or write down on a regular basis.  (Preferably all three.)

Doing this helps to reinforce those beliefs into your subconscious as “truths”.  And once things are reinforced into your subconscious, confidence starts to flow naturally.

You can use affirmations to reinforce existing positive beliefs, or to replace negative beliefs with positive ones.  So make a list of your genuine beliefs about yourself, women and dating – and start affirming the positive ones, and start affirming the opposite of the negative ones.

For example, if you believe that you’re shy and lack confidence, start affirming the opposite statement on a daily basis – “I am very confident and outgoing”.  Or if you believe that women wouldn’t be interested in talking to you, start affirming the opposite – “Women love meeting me because I’m charming and fun”.

Not only that, but you can also affirm statements about your behavior too.  For example, say you find approaching women terrifying, and therefore you hardly ever do it.  You can start affirming a positive statement about yourself – “I find approaching women easy and fun”.  But you can also start affirming a positive statement about your behavior – “I approach women all the time, it’s just what I do”. Both are very useful.

You may encounter a certain amount of mental resistance from your subconscious at first, particularly when it comes to the behavioral affirmations.  So if you find that there’s too much “jarring” in your mind at first, try softening the statements a little, by saying “I am becoming more…” or “I am getting much better at…”.  When they have started to sink in a bit, then you can change it up to the pure “I am” statements.

The real trick is to affirmations is to put yourself in a state of mind where you believe what you’re saying, and to think about it with great positive energy.  You know the feeling you get when you say to yourself “Yeah – awesome!” or “Hell yeah!” — that is the emotional state you should get yourself into just before you start reading them out.

I know it all sounds a little bit fruity, a little bit new-agey.  But the plain truth of the matter is that affirmations DO help.  They WILL start to have a impact if you repeat them to yourself with the right attitude often enough.

The “truths” you store in your subconscious have a big impact on your motivation, your choice of actions and your skill levels/abilities.  So start using them!

2. Watch Your Self-Talk

We all silently “talk” to ourselves all the time – in our heads.  And what we “say” to ourselves has a HUGE impact on our belief set.  So all the positivity and affirmations in the world won’t help if you’re secretly sabotaging everything with negative self-talk in between.

You need to be constantly aware of what you’re saying to yourself.  It should match up with your positive set of affirmations.

Each time you catch yourself thinking “These girls probably won’t be interested in talking to me” – stop, and turn it around.  Deliberately think the opposite: “These girls are going to love me!”.

This is harder than it sounds at first.  But with practice, reversing negative self-talk starts to become second nature – and eventually your entire thought pattern changes for the better.  So even if you don’t 100% believe what you’re saying to yourself at first, keep doing it – your subconscious will gradually start to accept it as the truth.

If you’d like to learn more about how to build confidence with women, download your FREE copy of the Attraction Playbook now.

Not only is there a whole section of the Playbook dedicated to building confidence with women, it’s also jam-packed with 70+ pages of poweful attraction tactics that will help you get the girls you really want.

It’s totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of this page, and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

Whilst men can get aroused in an instant by the sight of a hot female body, women are more of a slow-burn process.

So you need to make sure that you’ve generated plenty of attraction before making any moves.

If you’re trying to figure out how to arouse women, I’d suggest you start by focusing on these three things during your interactions with girls:

1.  Be A Challenge

A basic principle of human psychology is that we desire things that are in short supply, or that seem unobtainable – the principle of scarcity.  Things that have some intrinsic value that are also scarce or unavailable have a higher attributable value than those that are in abundance.

You can bring scarcity into play by being a challenge to women.  A man who is a challenge is naturally attractive.  Being challenging means making her work for it, just as much as she is making you work for it.  And it means not being a pushover.

When a girl knows that a guy is totally into her, that he would do anything to be with her, this presents zero challenge for her.  She has no need to do anything to seduce or keep him, and there’s no mystery or intrigue – this is not very attractive.

Whilst the traditional (feminist) view of courtship is that men are supposed to “do the chasing”, this neglects the very important fact that women LOVE the idea of “catching their man”.  If you simply fall right into a woman’s lap without any effort on her part, then it stands to reason that you cannot be worth her time or investment.  Subconsciously, women register this and their attraction for you decreases.

On the other hand, if she isn’t sure where she stands with you (“Is he actually interested in me or not? Why isn’t he kissing my ass like the other guys?) then you have a big advantage.  If she feels uncertain whether you are obtainable or not, basic scarcity psychology kicks in and makes you more desirable.

2.  Appear Preselected By Other Women

“Preselection” is a very powerful way to arouse women.  Women are attracted to men who other women desire.

Firstly, much like being a challenge, it invokes the power of scarcity.  If a woman perceives you as being preselected – desired by other women – then she will see you as a scarce and possibly unobtainable commodity, as you probably have other options.  You are therefore more desirable.

Secondly, it also invokes another major psychological power – social proof.

Social proof is part of our evolved decision-making process, because it is efficient.  We place a high value on things that we perceive other people as valuing highly.  This is because we don’t have the time or resources to independently research and test all the facts in any given scenario ourselves, so we rely on judgments already made by other people who have been in the situation.

(Which is why we read customer reviews and testimonials before buying something – we don’t have the means to figure out if a particular product is any good or not, so we have to rely on the opinions of other people.)

So when a woman sees that other women want you – for example if she sees other attractive girls chatting to you – then you are “preselected”.  Social proof kicks in, and she will subconsciously presume that you are high value and her attraction to you will increase.

3. Communicate That You’re Sexually Aware

This trait is often overlooked, but it is absolutely crucial if you want to arouse women. You MUST communicate that you’re sexually aware.

This has two distinct elements:

(a) You’re comfortable with the topics of sex and sexuality

Although you don’t actively bring them up in conversation, you’re totally comfortable with the topics of sex and sexuality.  You’re relaxed and cool when it comes to getting intimate a woman, and you don’t have any sexual hang-ups.

Being prudish about sex, getting embarrassed about sexual conversations, appearing uncomfortable when things start to get steamy – all these things reduce attraction.  Attractive alpha men are chilled out when it comes to the topic of sex, because it isn’t a big deal to them.

(b) You “get it”

You understand how the attraction process works – you “get what’s going on”.  You are fully aware of the “other level of communication” that is happening between you and the women underneath the spoken words.  (NB: One of the main purposes of this book is to help you “get it”…)

This is one of the main reasons that “telling her how you feel” kills your chances instantly – because it lets her know straight away that you DON’T “get it”.  And it’s into the “let’s just be friends” basket you go…

Of course, that’s just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to attraction and seduction.  If you’d like to learn more about how to arouse women and get them into bed, download your FREE copy of the Attraction Playbook now.

It’s jam-packed with 70+ pages of attraction tactics, seduction techniques and dating tips you can start using right now to get the girls you really want.

The Playbook is totally free, just enter your email in the box at the top of the page and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

There are very few “neutral” behaviors (although some are more important than others).

The male traits that attract beautiful women – or the lack of them – are displayed in everything a man does, and how he does it.

They are displayed in what he chooses to say, and how he says it.  They are displayed in his lifestyle, his habits and his choices.  And they are displayed through his body language, his posture and his voice tone.

Here are 3 key male character traits that magnetically attract beautiful women:

1.  Confidence

Confidence comes down to two things: self-belief and fearlessness.  Each element in isolation is a good thing, but you really need both in order to have true confidence.  You must both believe in yourself and be fearless as to any possible outcome.

Say a guy has to give a presentation at work.  If he believes in the material he has prepared and his ability to present it, and he is not scared by the possibility his colleagues may not like it, then he will be confident in giving that presentation.  And that would increase his attractiveness to the women in the room.

Or take the example of a guy approaching a group of women in a bar.  The more confidence he displays in the approach, the more attractive he will be to the women.  That confidence will require both a strong belief in himself (“I am an interesting, attractive man who women enjoy meeting”) and fearlessness (“If for some reason this doesn’t go well, that won’t faze me at all”).

Confidence is attractive when displayed in all situations in life, but it’s particularly important when interacting with women.

2.  Independence & Self-Security

Independence means making choices based on what you want to do, not based on what everyone else is doing.

Being self-secure means not needing anyone else’s approval for doing what you’ve chosen to do.  And it means not needing anyone else to be happy.

A man who always follows the crowd, who is needy and insecure, who seeks the approval of others (particularly women) is not attractive.  But a man who has his own ideas, who is carving out his own path in life, who pursues his desires and goals in the manner he wants to?  That is very attractive to women indeed.

Being independent and self-secure naturally results in a certain level of aloofness. This is attractive, provided you don’t take it too far.

3.  High Social Status

In the dating context, being “high status” means both having a high social status compared to the other guys around you, and having a higher social status than the girl you’re interacting with.

Don’t be arrogant, as that can sometimes have the opposite effect.  (There’s a fine line between conveying that you’re popular and in-demand, and conveying that you’re an arrogant dick…)  But it’s important to convey high status at all times.

You are popular, and have plenty of social options.  You are respected by others, men and women alike.

Of course, those traits are just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to attraction and seduction.  If you really want to know how to attract beautiful women, download your FREE copy of the Attraction Playbook now.

It’s jam packed with 70+ pages of killer attraction tactics you can start using right away to get the girls you really want.

The Playbook is totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of the page and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

Societal conditioning has imposed a peculiar fiction as truth, whereby men are shallow, horny dogs who are desperate for sex all the time – and women are pure-thinking angels who are only interested in an emotional relationship, and not really interested in sex.

This is total B.S. – it’s simply not true.

Women want sex and enjoy sex just as much as men do.  Women absolutely love sex, make no mistake – perhaps even more than men.  And knowing how to get a girl to sleep with you is not as complicated as you might think…

Once a girl is sufficiently attracted to you, she simply requires two further things:

(a) To feel safe

Generally speaking, men are not at risk sexually in their day to day lives.  But women are constantly at sexual risk throughout their lives.  At worst, a woman faces the danger of being raped by a man, but there are many lesser things too – a guy coming onto her too strong in a bar, a guy being too rough in bed, a creepy guy stalking her, or even just being leered at in the street everywhere she goes.

Sex carries negative connotations as well as positive ones for women, much more so than it does for men.  Hence women need to feel comfortable and safe with a man before sleeping with him.

(b) To not look or feel like a slut

Men are biologically designed to spread their seed, and could produce hundreds of children (by different mothers) in any given year, without any direct physical inconvenience.  Women can only produce one child every year or so, and being pregnant is a huge physical burden.  Sex therefore carries a much greater risk in terms of resources for women than it does for men.

As a consequence, promiscuity is perceived differently as between the sexes.  I’m sure we’re all aware of the “stud / slut syndrome”… men who sleep with lots of girls are studs, which is perceived as a good thing.  Women who sleep with lots of men are sluts – which is perceived as a bad thing.

Women’s safety and anti-slut barriers come up automatically in their interactions with men.  So as well as being the kind of man that is attractive to women, and making her feel safe, to get a girl to sleep with you also requires making her feel she can do so without looking or feeling like a slut.

To put it very simply:  Your job is to be an attractive man who she can sleep with without any negative consequences.

And once those negative consequences are removed, women absolutely love sex.  It’s amazing to see it once you’ve made a woman feel sexually comfortable with you – they can be real animals.

If you want to learn step-by-step EXACTLY how to get a girl to sleep with you – including everything from creating strong initial attraction, right through to getting her into bed – download your FREE copy of the Attraction Playbook.

It’s jam-packed with 70+ pages of attraction techniques and seduction tactics you can start using right now to get the girls you really want – including how to make her feel safe and non-slutty.

The Playbook is totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of this page and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

After all, who better to tell you how a woman’s mind works than a woman, right?

At some point, most men have therefore asked a woman – often a close female friend – what they’re looking for in a man.

Usually the response goes something like this: “I want a guy who makes me laugh, who is kind and honest, trustworthy, and who treats me well.”

Which is perfectly reasonable.  Except that they’ve forgotten to tell you something very important…

What They’re Not Telling You…

You see, when women describe what they are looking for in a man, they presume a high level of attraction when making that description.

When a woman says she wants a guy who is kind and honest, trustworthy, and treats her well, she really does want this.  (Everyone, male or female, wants to be treated well…)  But she has also presumed that this kind, honest man she is describing is also a guy who she feels strong attraction for.

Kindness, humor, honesty and trustworthiness are indeed things that women would like in a man – but only in an attractive man.

Deep down, what women are really looking for in a man are men who have the “Attractive Traits” – things like confidence, composure, independence, mystery and intrigue, sexual awareness and high social status.  “Good Guy Traits” like honesty and kindness are just the cherries on top, and have little impact on how much attraction they feel towards a man.

It isn’t that girls are deliberately lying about it, they often don’t realize it themselves.  The truth is, there is a huge discrepancy between what women think they would be attracted to, and what they actually find attractive.

They may love the IDEA of a complimentary, sweet guy – but that isn’t the same thing as what actually turns them on.  It’s not their fault – they are just biologically wired that way.

Stop being the kind of man that way women SAY they fall for.  Stop being the kind of man that society and the mainstream media tells you is attractive to women.

Knowing how to get a girl to want you starts with understanding the sort of man that women actually fall for – one who is confident, composed, challenging, fun, high-status, independent, mysterious and sexually aware.

A Quick Note About Humor:

“A guy who makes me laugh” is one of the first things that most women put on their dating wish list, so it’s worth having a closer look at this.

My view on humor is this:  Firstly, if you are able to make women laugh then you are helping display one of the Attractive Traits – namely being interesting & fun.  The problem with humor is that if you lack all the other Attractive Traits and you’re only funny, then it won’t help you much.  You’ll just be that funny goofy guy with whom they “just want to be friends”.

But when you DO display some of the other Attractive Traits – e.g. you are confident, assertive and sexually aware – then being funny as well can be a MASSIVE attraction booster.

If you want to learn exactly how to get girls to want you, download your FREE copy of the Attraction Playbook now.

It’s jam-packed with 70+ pages of attraction tactics that you can start using right now to get the girls you really want.

It’s totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of the page and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

A confident man is already miles ahead of the competition – even if he’s not good looking, rich, tall or powerful.

This is not just because he’s more likely to approach girls, but more importantly because confidence is one of the strongest attraction triggers in women.

But how do you build that confidence?  Obviously, gaining more experience with women naturally builds confidence over time.  But there are other things you can do to help the process along…

Here are the four things you can start doing right now, to help build the ‘alpha male mindset’ you need to have real confidence with girls:

1. Make Women A PART Of Your World, Not The CENTER Of It

Firstly, you need to internalize the core belief that women are NOT the center of your world.  Women should be an interesting, enjoyable PART of your life, but they should never be your entire focus.

Your focus should be on the other things in your life that you are passionate about – your career, making tons of money, conquering the world, playing in your band, saving starving children, whatever “your thing” is.

Be on your own path chasing your personal goals and passions, and see a woman as a great thing that can be a part of the experience.  If she fits your requirements (attractive, stable, fun, compassionate – whatever you require in a girl) then she can come along for the ride.

When you do this, attraction to you happens automatically – because it displays independence, confidence and self-security.  Plus it maintains mystery and intrigue, and pushes all the right psychological buttons.

But when any particular woman, or the desperate need to have a girlfriend, becomes the central focus of your life – the opposite happens.  You display neediness, insecurity and a lack of independence.  The more you obsess about a woman, or the need for a girlfriend, the less likely you are to get what you want.

In order to get it, you need to not need it in the first place.  It’s counter-intuitive, but it’s true.

2. Adopt An Abundance Mentality

Most guys have a scarcity mentality when it comes to meeting women.  They don’t believe there are many women who would be interested in them, so every interaction they DO have with a woman carries huge importance.

They think “I must not screw this up, because this girl is pretty and I may never get another chance to meet a girl like this again”.

The mindset of the alpha male – a confident, secure, attractive man – is that there is an endless stream of attractive girls out there who he can meet, so no particular one is that important.

And of course that is the truth.  There really is an endless supply of attractive women out there – they are everywhere.  Seriously, unless you live in a very small town, there is never a shortage of attractive women.

You just need to learn how to communicate with women properly, and know where to look for them.  (I cover those topics extensively in the Attraction Playbook, which you can download for free – see the top of this page…)

There’s no need to care very much about the outcome of any particular interaction with any particular woman, because if it doesn’t go the way you want then you just move on to the next one.

And if each outcome doesn’t matter much, then you’re more relaxed and composed going into it…  which in itself is very attractive.

3. Keep Your Options Open

When an inexperienced guy gets an indication of interest from a girl, he’ll usually shut down all thought of going after other women, and just focus all his energy on that one girl.

This is a bad idea, and is counter-productive for a number of reasons.  It’s very important to have multiple options in your dating life, and to be continuing to go after new girls – right up until the point where you enter an exclusive relationship.

By having two, three, four different girls who you are in contact with / who you could potentially be dating, this raises your social value as perceived by women in general (which is a big boost to your attractiveness).  And remember – if a girl you’re not yet exclusive with gets jealous that you seem to have options with other girls, this is a GOOD thing, not a bad thing!

Having options with more than one girl also takes the pressure of your interactions with each of them.  By having other girls to call, you don’t worry so much about any one particular date going well.

This helps your confidence levels, and allows you to relax more.  When you only have one woman to focus, you start to place too much importance on her, and you risk becoming needy and losing confidence.

4. Stop Taking Things Personally

Last but not least, don’t be discouraged because ONE particular girl did not respond to something.  That doesn’t necessarily mean that what you did was wrong, and it certainly doesn’t mean that you’re ‘girls just don’t like you’.

Some girls will just be having a bad day.  Some girls will have a boyfriend.  Some girls will have just come out of a bad breakup and are not yet over it.

Stop taking things so personally – it’s probably not what you think, and it certainly isn’t helpful.

Part 3 of the Attraction Playbook is dedicated to showing you various ways to build your inner confidence with girls, so go ahead and download your *FREE* copy now.

The Playbook also contains 70+ pages of attraction tactics that you can start using right now to get the girls you really want.

It’s totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of the page, and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

For most guys who don’t know any better, the entire plan of attack revolves around one (or both) of the following tactics:

1.  I’ll impress her by showing her what a good guy I am
2.  I’ll be a really good friend to her

They hope that eventually the girl will ‘see the light’ and fall for them.

Unfortunately, neither of those tactics work at all – in fact they both have the exact opposite effect.

When you attempt to win a girl over using one of these approaches, you kill any chance of attraction, and end up firmly in the ‘Just Friends’ category.

Let’s take a closer look at each tactic to see why it doesn’t work – and then I’ll show you how to win a girl over the RIGHT way…

Mistake 1 – Trying To Impress Her By Showing Her You’re A Good Guy

Impressing a girl with your “Good Guy Traits” – how thoughtful, caring and attentive you’d be, how honest you are, how you treat women as equals – all of that is counter-productive.

Those traits are good things for any person to have, but they have ZERO impact on how sexually attracted a girl will be to you.  They just mean that you’d make “a nice friend” for her.

Remember, people don’t logically choose who to be attracted to – attraction is triggered subconsciously.

For guys it happens when the girl looks good.  If she’s pretty, or has a great body – you feel attraction for her instantly.

For women, looks are only about 20% of the equation.  Attraction is primarily triggered in women when a guy displays a particular set of attractive traits – confidence, composure, independence and leadership, high social status, sexual awareness, and being a challenge/mystery.

The problem with the ‘trying to impress her’ mindset is that it results in you displaying the opposite of those attractive traits.   By trying to impress her by showing her you’re a good guy, you are communicating that you are desperate to earn her attention and approval, that her status is higher than yours, and that you are not entirely secure in yourself – that you are needy.

Those things are the exact opposite of the traits that DO generate attraction –and they will reduce attraction not increase it.

Men who are naturally very good with women (alpha males) don’t see their attractive behavior as “doing something to impress a girl” anyway.  In fact, they don’t wonder how to win a girl over or impress her at all – they don’t feel the need.

They simply have attractive traits, and therefore naturally behave in an attractive way.  And because they naturally behave in an attractive way, they always have plenty of options when it comes to women – meaning they don’t need to impress any one particular girl.

Mistake 2 – The “Supersized Friendship” Approach

The second tactic is referred to as the “supersized friendship” approach.  It’s where a guy tries to get a girl to like him by being a REALLY good friend.  He becomes super friendly, hangs out with her all the time, does lots of nice things for her, etc.

Unsurprisingly, this doesn’t work either.

Why? Because again, he isn’t doing anything that triggers attraction.  He’s doing things that will make her like him as a friend, that make her trust him, and that make her think he’s a good person.  But none of those things trigger sexual attraction.

When she finally hits him with the “I don’t think we should ruin our friendship” line, or the “I’m just too busy for a relationship” line, what she really means is “I don’t feel attracted to you.”

If you don’t trigger attraction, then you get put in the “just friends” basket.  And once you’re in the “just friends” basket, it’s very difficult to get out of it.  It’s really tough for guys who do this, because logically it seems like it should work, and by spending all that time with her he’s probably fallen even more in love with her too.

So stop trying to do the supersized friend thing – it only gets you hurt.

To learn how to win a girl over the RIGHT way, download your FREE copy of the Attraction Playbook.

The Playbook is jam-packed with 70+ pages of attraction tactics, techniques and strategies you can start using right now to get the girls you really want.

It’s totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of the page and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

Occasionally girls will do the approaching themselves, but for the average guy this doesn’t happen very often.  Women will sometimes move into your proximity if they’d like to be approached, but it’s still up to you to take the plunge.

Men therefore need to learn how to approach, the things to say to women when doing so, and to become generally comfortable starting conversations with strangers.

The first thing a guy says to a girl when he approaches is commonly called the ‘opener’.  Openers can be either direct (indicating obvious sexual interest) or indirect (a seemingly innocent conversation starter).

In any situation other than drunken hook-ups at bars and clubs, I recommend indirect openers, not direct ones.  Alpha males with very high visible social proof can go more direct, but even then it tends to result in more strike-outs.

An indirect opener is really just a context or excuse to start talking to her.  It can take many forms – a comment, a question, a light-hearted joke about something you both just saw – anything that can kick-start a conversation.  In the right context, even just saying “hi” in a friendly manner with a smile can be sufficient.

Openers Aren’t Meant To Be Magical

The opener isn’t meant to do any of the heavy lifting when it comes to building attraction.  There aren’t any “magic pickup lines” that will get you straight into a girl’s pants. An opener merely functions as a way to give you a reasonable context in which to start an interaction.

Indirect openers also give you plausible deniability – if things don’t turn out well, then you can plausibly deny any sexual interest.  You were just chatting to her because you’re friendly, or you did actually want to know the answer to the question you asked.  Subconsciously, the girl probably knows what is going on when you start talking to her – but by having plausible deniability, you’ve done it in a smooth, non-awkward way.

The key with openers is to be normal and bring a fun, relaxed, happy vibe.  Avoid anything too “slick”.  You could come up with all the cleverest “opening line” in the world, but it will probably come across as forced and awkward.

Instead, concentrate on maintaining good relaxed body language and voice tone, a “I’m having a great time, and chatting to people is just something I do” vibe – and just say something fun, interesting or contextual to the surroundings.

Try making a comment about something a girl is wearing / carrying – “Hey those are cool shoes, where did you get them?”  Or try asking a couple of girls sitting together for a female opinion about something interesting or slightly controversial.  Or comment about this really drunk guy who you just saw dancing in traffic.

Body Language And Voice Tone Are The Key

Remember, it’s not really about WHAT you say, it’s about HOW you say it – your body language and voice tone.

The worst opening line in the world will do just fine if you have relaxed, confident, non-threatening body language, and deliver it in a fun, chatty way.  Conversely, you could have the most fascinating, relevant “question opener” in the world – but if you have nervous, insecure body language and you stutter, you’ll come across as creepy.

Whilst contextual, spontaneous openers are usually best, it is also a good idea to always have a couple of basic “canned” openers prepared, that you can fall back on if you can’t think of anything to say.  Just be sure to keep them simple – the more “clever” or “funny” or contrived, the more likely you are to activate their “player” sensors.  Whilst openers can be prepared, they should always seem natural, fun and spontaneous.

Note that you can open a group containing the girl you are interested in, or you can open a girl by herself.  If you are opening a group, the key is to open the group as a whole – you need to win the trust and interest of the whole group, not just the target girl.

The vibe for group approaches should be “I’m a fun, social guy who is out meeting new fun people” or “I have an interesting story that I’m dying to share with people” or something along those lines.

Time Constraints Can Lower Barriers

Try giving an artificial time constraint as you open too – e.g. “Hey, look I’ve got to get back to my friends in a moment, but I wanted to ask you a question real quick…”  This drop people’s guard, because they don’t get that initial “how are we going to get rid of this guy” feeling that people sometimes get when approached by strangers.

Getting over the worst of your approach anxiety so that you can start conversations in a confident, fun manner takes a fair bit of practice.  But the more you do it, the better you’ll get.

And here’s the best part: by going the indirect route with your opener, you’ll always have plausible deniability – so there never needs to be any “rejection”, because you were just being friendly.  Eventually, you won’t even think much about what you say to open, you’ll just go up and say hi – and your positive, confident vibe will do the rest.

Oh, and one more thing – when approaching a girl who is by herself, always smile – it’s less threatening.

To get more killer info on approaching, building attraction, seduction and dating tips – download your FREE copy of the Attraction Playbook now.

The Playbook is jam-packed with 70+ pages of insider strategies most men will never know.

It’s totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of the page, and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

Women are fundamentally creatures of emotion, not logic.

Unlike men, women make decisions and take actions based largely on how they FEEL about something, not based on what they logically think about it.  They are intuitive and empathetic, not rational.

The consequence for this for men is that to generate attraction and excite a woman, you must emotionally stimulate her – not engage her in rational discussion.

This is a core concept, and absolutely essential to success with women: you must push her emotional buttons.  The more you can take her through a rollercoaster of imagined emotions, the more she will connect with you.

Similarly, as long as what the two of you are doing FEELS right to her, she’ll be able to rationalize and accept the idea of sleeping with you.

Exciting & Emotive Topics Are The Key

Telling a girl about your job as a software engineer does not build attraction.  Talking about where you went to school and where you live does not build attraction.  Logical analysis of things and how they work does not build attraction.  Conversations about man-stuff like cars and sports and financial markets do not build attraction.  None of those things excite women.

Of course, there’s nothing wrong with finding out where she’s from and how many brothers and sisters she has.  Those can be good starting points for conversation threads that are more interesting and emotive.

But you mustn’t START with boring topics like that – you only get one chance to make a first impression. Nor can the majority of your conversation stay on those sorts of boring topics.  You’ll kill any attraction you have generated if you do.

She’ll end up describing you like this: “Yeah he seemed nice, I just didn’t feel any spark / chemistry”…

Instead, engage women in conversations about fun, exciting and emotive topics – the difference between men and women, romance, spirituality, travel, celebrities, books and movies, mysteries and topics of intrigue or passion.

And when you’re telling a story, don’t just relate the plain facts and the dialogue.  Instead, describe the emotions that you and others were feeling at the time.

Try to make HER feel – right then and there – the same way you were feeling in the story.

Keep The Conversation Moving

Keep the conversation alive by moving from one entertaining topic to another – don’t get stuck on one topic for too long.

Men like to exhaust a topic, to drill down into it and examine all the different possibilities and angles, to get a measure of closure on things.  Women, on the other hand, love to careen from one subject to another – feeling the emotions of one topic and then moving on quickly to something new and interesting.  Make sure this happens, or you’ll start losing attraction fast.

Try not to revisit topics just because they got a positive response the first time around, as this can come across as approval seeking.  (NB: “riffing” on a joke is the exception to this rule.  But it has to be done sparingly, and with proper comic timing.)

As your interaction progresses, you can also include more “risqué” conversational topics (although nothing too graphic).  This demonstrates that you’re comfortable with your sexuality, and will also help to subtly shift her into a more erotic frame of mind.  Just don’t overdo it too early.

Of course, this is just the tip of the iceberg when it comes to learning how to excite women…

The Attraction Playbook contains 70+ pages of powerful attraction tactics and techniques that you can start using right now to get the girls you want.

Download your *FREE* copy now – just enter your details in the box at the top of this page and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan

Flirting with women is a fantastic way to build attraction, because it changes the underlying dynamic from a non-sexual one to a sexual one, without being too direct or obvious.

When done well, flirting communicates all the right things – is says to the woman that you are confident, fun, intelligent, challenging and sexually aware – all of which sparks attraction.

The problem a lot of guys have when learning how to flirt with women is trying to remember a bunch of rules, techniques and steps to follow.  Until you’ve had plenty of practice and have interacted with lots of women, it can all be a little bewildering.

So here’s what I usually recommend to guys who are just starting out…

Focus On An Overall ‘Frame’

Instead of trying to remember a hundred different lines, role-play routines or flirting techniques, focus instead on maintaining an overall mental ‘frame’.

A frame is a particular interpretation or perspective on what is going on around you.  There are certain mental ‘frames’ you can use during interactions with women that will subconsciously make you flirt the right way, feel more confident, and maintain the right body language and voice tone.

As you get more practiced with this stuff, you’ll be able to focus on perfecting individual techniques, because all the basics will have become second nature.  But if you’re just starting out, here are a couple of excellent frames you can use (by themselves, or in combination) as you’re learning how to flirt with women:

Frame 1:  She’s Your Annoying Little Sister

The first frame is to treat the girl as if she was your annoying little sister.

Deep down you love her, but she’s a real pain in the ass too, always doing things that annoy you.  You are reluctantly taking her along for the ride in whatever you’re doing, and will tease her constantly and tell her off for being bratty and annoying.

This frame is fun as hell, and is probably my favorite frame of all because it’s so playful.

Frame 2:  She’s Screwing Up Her Chances With You

The second frame is this:  You know she’s really into you, but she’s totally screwing up her chances with you by doing dumb stuff.

You can say things in a “mock-serious” tone, like:

“It would never work out between us.”
“Oh you just ruined your chances with me.”
“Oh no, I was just starting to like you before you said that!”
“That guy over there looks perfect for you.”
“You’re fired.”
“I can tell we’re going to have a love/hate relationship.”
“You’re creepy!”  (This one is particularly awesome, as women use “creepy” as a shaming word against men all the time..)

The key is to use this frame is to make it fun and playful.  You don’t want it to be goofy, but you’re not dead serious about it either.

Using these frames has another hidden effect too.  When the girl plays along with the joke, it makes her subconsciously qualify herself to you.  Even though she’s not being 100% serious about it.

The underlying effect – even though on the surface it’s ‘all just a bit of fun’ – is nevertheless to subtly and subconsciously raise your status.  You are a guy who must be worth the time and effort, not just another guy who is trying hard to win her affection like all the rest.

And raising your status is one of the major keys to attraction.

To learn more great attraction building strategies, download your FREE copy the Attraction Playbook.

It’s jam packed with 70+ pages of powerful attraction tactics you can start using right now to get the girls you want.

It’s totally free, just enter your details in the box at the top of this page and you’ll get instant access.

Happy hunting,

Ryan